So...I'm in my freshman year in college. A lot of people got out of their relationships before they left for school, but I didn't. And I know some people who had a bf/gf, but they hooked up with some guy/girl the first night of school. I always thought that was so ridiculous. How can people cheat? And I always thought that if I ever really wanted to be with someone else, I would just break up with my boyfriend. I mean, I think about other guys sometimes, and I have had stupid little crushes, but it's never been really serious, and I love my boyfriend to death. Or, at least I thought I did.
I went to a party Friday night with my roommate and her boyfriend. They're big on drinking and smoking pot, so I knew what kind of party it would be and what we would be doing. It was a foam party, so we wore out bikinis. We were drinking bacardi and coke (more bacardi than coke) and we passed around some Tilt before we even got there. I was already a little tipsy when we showed up. So it was fun from the beginning. And I felt a little guilty, because I'm lightweight straightedge and I don't usually do these things.
I'm not the type of girl that does crazy things when she gets drunk, like dancing on tables and running around topless. but I get a lot looser, because I'm normally really shy and uptight.
So we get there and I'm meeting A.T's friends, and I notice one guy who's really good-looking. After a while, we're drunk enough and there's enough foam to take our clothes off and just wear our bikinis. And we start looking for this guy, Tony, because we hear he has weed, and we really wanted to smoke a bowl. So we find him and we go upstairs to...you know...And this guy and I start hanging around each other, dancing, drinking and smoking. We're standing there dancing in the foam, and I turn around and start kissing him. I was glad that he was with me, so other guys wouldn't hit on me, but in the back of my mind, I knew what I wanted, and since I was...disoriented I felt like I could do whatever I wanted to. We kissed a lot...
I wanted to see the inside of the main house, which was closed off, so he got someone to open it up and he gave me a tour. More kissing in there. Then we sat in the living room and started fooling around.
If my roommate hadn't walked in the two times that she did, who knows what could have happened. It's not that I can't control myself, I just didn't want to. When I'm in that state of mind, I do things that I really want to do, that I normally wouldn't do.
I'm at my boyfriend's house today. I've never felt so guilty in my life. What if I did have sex with that guy? How would I have felt then? What if my bf knew? How would he feel? I don't plan on telling him, and if he even knew that I went to a party with my roommate, he'd flip out, because he knows what kind of people they are, and we're not like them. Ugh. I don't regret any of it, but what would have happened if I hadn't decided to stop drinking and try to sober up? I've only been with one guy, and we're still dating. How would I feel giving myself to a guy that I met 3 hours ago? A guy who smokes weed and drinks a lot. I don't like guys like that.
I don't really need advice, I just couldn't keep that to myself. I have a problem with keeping secrets, and I don't want to let anything slip to Mark.
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Well, I'm not exactly sure how you feel about the whole thing. You're guilty but...don't regret what happened with the weed guy? Even if you don't say it, he'll probably find out. Wouldn't you rather have him hear it from you than from someone else? Being in a relationship needs a lot of trust and communication. But you feel better by keeping quiet, then by all means...You should thank your roommate then. Perhaps she just saved your future. Who knows what would've happen if you did it with a guy. Pregnancy is one possibility.
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Thank goodness you have a good friend.
Remember, what goes around, comes around. It sounds like he is an okay guy if her is trying to keep you from those types of people. He obviously care for you & your safety.
I would have to tell. If someone did that to me I would want to know.
i feel the same way about relationships--if i knew i was going to cheat, i would just break up with my boyfriend because i obviously don't care about him enough not to stray.
what you did, in my opinion, is hardly a crime. the only thing is that you had a boyfriend that you could have done those things with, and that is what people notice. if it was me, i would be telling my guy about what happened--if he gets pissed and leaves me, that is just how things will go. there will be other guys out there, right? but maybe i am just more lax on relationships than most people. i'm pretty open to a lot of things.
RB
When you least expect it, life throws you a curve--take it and put it straight again.
hey - just throwing this out there - you should tell your boyfriend.
my bf cheated on me and he was the one who told me about it.
maybe im dumb for staying with him after that but it felt good to know that he couldnt have a heavy concience so he HAD to tell me to get it off his mind. i think you should tell your bf exactally what you wrote here and go from there cuz you would rather tell him than have him find out. thats for sure. think about it and do it fast. tell him your sorry and its not going to happen again....than keep your promise