Can anyone who has ever had a child understand what it is like to hold that baby for the first time and hope for such a bright future or atleast that they would do better then you did?
I just found out my teenager is drinking vanilla extract every morning to get drunk before school. She had it in a bottle in the refrigerator. I thought it was tea and took a sip. I didn't know what it was so I brought it to my husband to try. We both realized what it was. She had been drinking it for a couple of months because she wanted to feel numb and stop the pain she was feeling. Who drinks vanilla extract of all things? I don't have any alcohol in my house except that.
We were just begining to trust her again. We thought she was finally coming around. Now I will spend another holiday screaming in an emergency room with her while we go through the admissions process of another psyc admit.They drug her up and throw her right back out the door. It isn't their life why should they care?
Every bone in my body wants to be so angry at her !! I hear from the staff of the hospital she can't help the way she feels. We have had her grandfather here since he had a stroke. I could understand him feeling like she is. I feel she is just being self centered and enough is enough. Even with medication she finds new ways to screw up!Its been 8 years!
She has two younger sisters. One follows her every move.The other defies me and dares me to take it to the limit with her.
I am so envious of the perfect family. While I am replacing doors from temper tanrums they are vacationing and living a life. I spend so much time crying over these kids.
I am begging and pleading with God to forgive me for all the horrible things I did. He can't just stop this and give us peace. Whatever I did to deserve her please God I am sorry!
I don't know if there will ever be an answer. I want to be happy so bad. The making your mind up to be is not going to help when you have a mentally ill child.
I don't want these people's pitty. I am so tired of poor you. What I want is this kid to want to suceed as bad as I want her to. I love them, I buy them what they need. I don't spoil them. I raise them with God and with empathy for those who are less fortunete.Where am I going wrong?
It is thanksgiving. I am thankful she is still alive and we are still together. We have a family no matter how screwed up it is. I would be more thankful for peace everywhere.
I haven't been in your situation. My mom has, kindo of. I was at a point in my life where she didn't know day to day if she'd find me alive when she came home from work in the worning because I had triend to kill myself so much. I was so depressed and so deeply wraught in Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome from having been raped twice in an 18th month period where the first one attempted to murder me. I was so wrapped up in all the hurt I felt that it consumed me. I know it hurt my mom and I can imagine she had a moment or moments like you are feeling now.
I am going to email this blog to my mom, and then help her set up an account so she can share with you how she got through it and what it was like for her.
You and your family are in my prayers.
-Lisa
In your case I can completely understand.
My daughter has been a target for every sicko that thought she wouldn't be smart enough to tell anyone if they touched her. She may have made an easy target for them who knows. But she was smart enough to know right from wrong.She knew they were wrong.
Sexually preditors are some very sorry sick individuals. One day they will answer for their crimes.
I cannot imagine what you have gone through. God be with you and may his angels protect you!!
I was starting to feel bad for you, and was going to give you some ideas to help-until I read "Now I will spend another holiday screaming in an emergency room with her while we go through the admissions process of another psyc admit.They drug her up and throw her right back out the door. It isn't their life why should they care?"
That is EXTREMELY WRONG. Stupid. Selfish. Stuckup...I really could go on.
My mother is an ER nurse, and all my life I have only ever heard of her being treated like shit because of people like you. "it isn't their body why would they care?'
They do care. They probably care more than you. It is their job to care. Unlike people like you, they have feelings when it comes to others. They respect the patient as far as they can. It's people like you that piss them off, and people like you that make THEIR lives hard.
You aren't the only one with problems, your not the only one with feelings. Think of the staff next time.
I hope that wasn't directed at my post...
I didn't say those things, the first poster did. I am a medical professional. I may not get to see the psychiatric side of things very often but as you can see, I have been through it on the other end. I have the utmost respect for the nurses, they have given me a whole lot of respect and compassion in my battle.
If it was directed to you I would have hit "reply" under yours-and it would have been indented under your reply.
It was intended for the original poster.
Actually that comment was directed toward the psychiatric field. I know the Er nurses care. I have always been treated with respect by them. But the psychiatric doctors never adress the problem the answer for them is always lets try this medication.
I tell them we need to yank this problem out by the roots. Get it where it started not put a bandaid aka another psych drug on top of a huge wound.
The Er nurses deserve medals. I wouldn't be alive and neither would my daughters if it weren't for them. But for the psych docs some honest to God do not care about the patient. They care about the how fast we can be discharged. There isn't even a treatment center in my state for teen alcoholics. We are a big military town . Some military people came here for the psych facilities they found out were no better then their states.
Now does anyone know that nearly half of all inmates are mentally ill? Instead of treating them they put them in jail because there is no where else for them. If you want your kid in treatment they have to have a judge send them to treatment with charges.
My daughter is on probation until she is 18.She was charged with 3 counts of assault in the name of treatment. She spent 9 months in a residential facility, 6 months in juvenile hall and 3 months in a group home .
My hat goes off to your mom but does she know what happens to the patients she treats?
Honestly? Yes. She does. She was/is always telling us stories, not only about the things they went through to get into the ER, but a lot of patients come back and tell her their stories or to thank her and such. She really does know.
If you intended it for the psych area--it shouldn't have been included in the same sentence/paragraph as being in the ER. There is a difference.
It is proven kids are the way they are because of their family environment. Maybe it is not her fault but yours.
http://www.colbertnation.com/
http://www.NRA.org/
Ha ha...thats a good one. My daughter has been raised with two parents that love her and two sisters who think the world rises and sets in her. She is never left alone, she is taken to school and we sit through every available plan for her.
The thought that kids are a product of their invironment came from some republican sitting in the office cutting funds for mentally ill people including children so he could line his own pockets. It probably sounds good to the people!
She has a chemical imbalance. At 9 months she NEVER slept, at 3 she unlocked a door and took a walk down the street. The door had 3 deadbolts on it with the keys hidden. This was 2 in the AM.
At 7 she wanted to die, at nine she tried to kill herself, and has been in threapy since 7. Explain that one Dr spock.
My other two daughters? One is on honor roll and the other is a girl scout.
Oh my gosh! That is not "proven"! That has been an ongoing argument for quite some time now. Go back to school and study "Nature VS. Nurture."
It's people like you that make people think that they are a product of their environment and that they aren't responsible for their actions.
Thank you I aced Psychology. I am a college student. I still don't agree people are a product of their environment.
Here is a senario. You have 10 kids in the house 8 of whom are professionals, 2 are criminals EXPLANATION?
When someone has a chemical inbalance it does not matter. Explain children who are adopted in loving homes becoming introuble with the law. One specifically I know for a fact was raised with a marine and his wife. They loved this kid with all their heart, were model parents and he still ran away and became a male prostitute! He is doing better now thanks to his parents . Do the research idiot!!!
The biological parents were criminals. They didn't raise these kids loving adoptive parents did yet the child still ended up in a cell beside them.
Everyone is responsible for their own actions!!
The devil made me do it is a crap defense!
But the nature Vs Nurture argument cannot explain why kids who are adopted have problems now can it?
Nor can it explain the behaviors of a bipolar child. There is a book that if you can read on that big of a level will explain it. ITs called " The bipolar child"
There is also autistic children. READ ABOUT THEM IN YOUR PSYCH BOOK!
Then I will be waiting for your apology.
MENTALLY ILL child. My answer to you or any doctor saying that, is not at all.
Your daughter only mental problem, is that she wants all eyes on her. Same goes for the other two. Temper tantrums, ummmm a butt whoopin, some talking to (real talking) not arguing/yelling, anything could really stop that. No child actually deserves to go to some for of therapy unless it's physical. Otherwise, speaking to the parent in a well-full type of manner every now and then can help a child or anyone in a great way. Ask her what it is that she wants out of life, ask her how she really feel about home, ask her what pain it really is that is bothering her. And to reply to her answers, understand her.
People basically need to truly learn how to speak those around them, or if there are any problems around, those problems will just continue until death. Teach a person to do something, and they will do it. Expect them to do it, without truly giving them the training for that lesson, and they will rebel, because there's no real reason for them to believe in that lesson. Hope you understood that one.
It is obvious you are not a doctor and have NOT studied anything on this topic because that was the most ignorant comment I've ever heard. Don't go around (un)diagnosing people when you are so clueless on the topic.
I did spank my kids at one point. They lived like prisoners for a while. That didn't work. My 12 year old has emotional problems because being in a house with 2 bipolar people is ..well...is ...walking on egg shells doesn't come close. She is on honor roll. She deals as best she can I guess. We have had so many inhome councilors they disagree on where the couch looks the best in our living rooms.
My 6 year old is basically a good kid but again when you have a child like my oldest who is always doing something how much stability can you have in a home? We have had the police here, social workers, you name it ..this child is a terror. She knows it and doesn't want to be this way but doesn't know how to stop it.
I told her to put her big girl panies on and get on with the life she wants. No amount of hospitalizations, in home treatments, jail terms, or punishments is going to work if she never tries!
After talking to her until like 4 am she doesn't have anymore answers then I do. She has no reason to feel the way she does , its just that black hole of depression that swallowed her again.
When she is manic she is the life of the party and flies with emotion. She couldn't even go in walmart because of too much stimulation.
As far as teaching a person to do something this is only true if that person's desire is strong enough to learn what you are trying to teach.
I learned a long time ago children live what they learn. There is no hitting by any adults,no shouting by any adults, no cutting anyone down,and there will be empathy to those in need.
I just left the Er after admitting my FIL for another stroke.
I haven't decided on treatment for her yet. She doesn't meet criteria for admission unless she is suicidal or homicidal. That is their rules.Unless she actively tries to kill herself I am left pleading to deaf ears with a hospital intake officer.
They told me to charge her with a crime again....what a lovely society we live in.
Happy thanksgiving everyone.
I have an old friend, who with I always had been like a guidence for her. It's as if because I was on the outside and had positive things to say about her and the things that she could have, she actually wisened up a little. This female has been in and out of jail, tried remember....only tried suicide a bunch of times. A true crazy person, doesn't try to kill themselves, they just do it. Others ask for attention, they just want everyone to notice them...and sometimes, it does take them a while to realize what they really want, shoot for people who aren't said to have issues usually take a while to really figure out what they want in life. Life isn't going to be just a piece of cake or even a happy little thing for most people.
She like others need to experience some new things, that's what life is about, experience and truly understanding that of which lies on this planet. If you keep doing the same little things, then sure, you're going to keep coming back with the same replies. Things should change in a drastic but slow way, new types of family fun whether they like it or not, new types of laws, etc etc etc. A person will not be happy in life, unless they actually live life, and right now, she's not living.....she's being told how to think, not how to do, but how to actually think. A person rebels against that most of the time, because they feel in their mind, that another person should not be able to tell them how to live their lives. These so called doctors, need to learn how to give their patients, options, and not ways/rules to live life.
If my child is in such a depression that he/she feels that they have to go eleswhere, to get help, then maybe there is something wrong with the (options) that I have given them within their life, because obviously....someone went wrong here. Not pointing any fingers, but ummm how about you step your game up, and try to make yourself happy. If you are truly happy, then getting others to feel just as happy or close to it, will not be such a problem.
Hey, vanilla ain't no thing. What you need to look out for is if she has "listerine" in her bathroom. I had friends in school who bought those big bottles of listerine and had a "friend" buy them a bottle of vodka. Then, they would poor the listerine down the drain and fill the bottle with vodka and put in a few drop of food coloring and get drunk off that.
I hope everything works out for you.
Thanks I feel much better now. I don't buy listerine. Sorry for calling you an idiot. I am not dumb when it comes to bipolar and the way you raised them.
My husband was also raised by parents who paid his way through college, sent him to prom more times then I can count and provided a loving nurturing home. When I met him he was an alcoholic.
When he got off the alcohol he was abusive. He never had seen that in his home environment.
Alcoholism ran in his family.He is also a functioning bipolar. Many many years of treatment later and a seperation I may add.
Seems like you could have been overprotective of her when she was young, this causes kids to rebel subconsciously.
+mspin