Sometimes one sentence says it all
July 5 1996 2:00 am
It is going to be a very long day!!
T
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Sure it is a small entry, and I don't even remember why I wrote it that way. What I do know is sometimes I feel like my life has been one long day and it has yet to get over with. I think I was still down south with Valarie and we where busy all day long with her family. Who knows but I am still waiting for the day to end.
Acting My Age
July 6, 1996 10:50 pm
Once again I must leave the women I love. It is weird, I finally find some to love and we are force to be separated. Ironic as it sounds, that is a good thing. It forces me to reexamine my life and motivates me to start acting my age, and take some kind of responsibility for what the future holds.
There are a few obstacles that stand in my way, but I don't care. I will have to jump over them or just knock them out of the way.
Shane at one time offered me the chance tom move in. That was just fine, it was just me and him. Now it is totally different. Sense Chris ( I will discuss him later, maybe) has got Shane working with him and he does not have his trailer. It is now Shane and Chris, Val can still stay on the couch but she has to help out with the bills. The way it look at it is this, if Val is not working I will be paying her share of the bills. If that is the case I would rather get a hole in the was apartment and live with her myself.
Lately it seem the people who I thought were my friends are pulling all kinds of shit and it was giving Val the feeling that she is not wanted up here, and I am to the point where I am ready to tell everyone to go to hell. I don't need them and there will always be other people to be friends with.
God I could use a drink to help me relax and it's only 3:08 am.
What will happen next,
T
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Of course I did not reexamine my life because I still made the same mistakes. Falling for the wrong kind of girl. Getting in more debt (which to say I am almost out of), and not moving forward in a positive direction. I was blinded by what I thought was love, that I was relying on others then myself to make thing right. It did not help that I was work at a low paying monkey job. There wood be no way for me to afford a place for Val and myself. It is ironic both my brother and I were starting new lives, he by adding a body (his wife) and I by losing one. There are times I still feel like I am getting adjusted to this new life.
