Endorphins are so much fun
Feb 7 1997 9:00pm
After I got off work a Piasa I went to Laurel’s and we slept a little then we mad love. She then explained to me that she really needed that. It was more emotional then any of the other times. She had encountered an old boyfriend at work and it made her feel uneasy. By my coming over and holding her, I guess she realized that I am willing to be with her.
I do enjoy being with her and I think I lover her, but what bugs me the most is she is will try and find out how I will react to different situations. When she does that she is not all that honest about her motives and when I think I may have said something wrong I find myself thinking about Val. I will always love her that I cannot change. There are still things that made me attracted to her that I don’t see in Laurel (not yet at least). Val has that child like nature that helped balance out my side. With Laurel I see her seriousness all the time, not stopping and acting childish for her own health. She has had to support herself almost all her life and I think she does not know how to put her problems away for awhile and just be silly and childish. I guess it is something I will have to work on.
Until Then
Tim
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Sometimes you just need a change of scenery to get the creative mind to kick in. So I stopped in to the hotel where a friend works to talk and try and write. Lately I just can’t get in the mood to do another entry. Hopefully this will help.
Where to start? Each person has different traits that we are attracted to. I have always liked the slightly scatterbrained smart chicks. I don’t know why I just am. They are very intelligent and I think it gives them a youthful appearance. That is what made me like Val and my most resent heart break. If your reading this then you know who you are, but who am I to dig up the past?
There is nothing wrong with being silly and childish. Hell some of my best friends are silly and childish, and that is by choice. If you don’t laugh and smile, your heath starts to frown. When you smile it produces the feel good chemical. “Endorphins are so much fun!” Even when you are faking it, your brain does not know. The chemical is still there. So go ahead and fake that smile, people will wonder what you’re up to and you will feel good about it.
Life will throw you curve balls, fastballs and if you are luck the occasional slow ball.
You were very positive in this blog. Keep writing I like your wisdom. I have faked a smile alot. I believe each day you can make the day bad or good. If you stay in a positive mood most the time good things normally happen. if someone stays in a bad mood then bad things seem to happen because you expect it. I have learned this and it helps me out alot.
I did not always have such a positive attitude. When all the crap was going down years ago, I felt like nothing was going right, like the whole world was against me. The key thing to remember is just let time take it course and things do work out. After a few years of living you do not let small stuff have the same impact that they normally would.