The Aftermath of a Spider Biting My Arse

So, here’s the arse update.

My spider bite went through a series of ups and downs. At times it hurt, at others it hurt….less. It grew into a good-sized red circle, with a smaller black area in the middle. On Saturday, it was doing better. The black circle started to shrink, but it still hurt like hell. As the day progressed, it started to hurt worse and worse. I was barely walking by the end of Sunday night.

For those of you who are just tuning in, I got bit by a spider. On the butt. You can read about it here:
http://www.progressiveu.org/232023-spider-bit-my-arse

I went to my scheduled follow up on Monday, wondering if my butt would still be attached to my legs when I left. I was informed that the area should be cut out, and that I had acquired an infection. The small dot that I once thought was a pimple was now a lump about the size of a softball. I hobbled to the surgery room, and leaned over a table with my butt hanging out for about 30 minutes. I finally decided to lie down, since the 5 billion injections I took on the bite itself in order to make the area quasi-numb seriously impaired my ability to stand. After much cutting, poking, and squeezing, I was taped up and free to go. My hump was nearly lump-free, and I was armed with 20 Lortabs to keep me in my happy place. The only downfall was that the Lortabs worked as well as the local anesthesia did, so I was still in pain for the next few days.

Today, my rump is feeling better. It’s not in constant pain, and I can almost sit normally. There’s still a big ugly hole, but it is getting smaller.

Being bitten by one of only two confirmed deadly spiders that live in your state can teach you some valuable life lessons. I was reminded to appreciate being able to take the stairs, and to get up and exercise while I can. I also learned that eating everything in sight while doing minimal physical activity does cause one to gain weight. The final lesson I learned was that I have more time than I think. I don’t have to run or speed walk everywhere I go- I can still get everything done if I hobble from room to room.

So next time you feel like life is really being cruel, go find a brown recluse and just make the thing mad. Stick him in your bed at night, put him in your shoe along with your sock-free foot, or try to pet him. Your outlook will change within a week or two- I promise.

As always, please rate me even if you didn't like my blog. Why? Because unlike spider bites, ratings do a body good.

Like what you're reading? Check out my blog on saving money and being green. It's full of original ideas to help cut back your spending and give Mother Earth a pat on the back at the same time. Here's the link:
http://www.progressiveu.org/005822-new-ways-save-money-and-environment-y...

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