I never realized until I came to Maryland how thoroughly biased I am to my native New England. People always joke about New England snobbery, and I can now testify that they are not exaggerating. The following are my confessions, and general points:
I’m out: I am 100% New England snob, and proud.
I guess I never realized that in no other region to people joke about seceding from the union on a regular basis.
Every time it sleets/hails/snows/or wintery-mixes here, I call my friends and make fun of Marylander’s inability to deal with the slightest touch of winter. The forecast is 40% chance of precipitation, so they coat the roads with salt and cancel school. Puh-lease people. Go to Massachusetts and get a taste of some real snow. And by the way, 40 degrees is not cold.
I hate the Yankees. I love the Red Sox, and I always will. No, I did not hop on the bandwagon in 2004. I don’t like you as much if you did.
I don’t care if it wasn’t a perfect season, and I don’t care if we “cheated.” I still route for the Pats, and Tom Brady is a beast.
Did you know that the smiley face, candlepin bowling, and the monkey wrench were all invented in my hometown of Worcester, MA?
In Massachusetts, we recycle all plastic, paper, cans, and glass; none of this only #1 and #2 business. We have free curbside recycling collection in Worcester. Come on Maryland, is it seriously that big of an inconvenience to invest in some better recycling programs?
The metro is nice … but we can eat on the T.
We have no road signs, we have a maximum of three lanes in our highways, and yet, there is so much less traffic on the Pike than on the Beltway.
You might listen to James Taylor, but do you actually know what he’s talking about when he says “the first of December was covered with snow / And so was the turnpike from Stockbridge to Boston”
In Massachusetts, everyone has the right to get married.
I willingly label myself a Masshole.
Generally though, I really do like Maryland. It’s a great state and DC is a wonderful city. This list is in good humor… mostly.
Excuse me, I was led to believe that Forrest Gum invented the Smiley Face.
40º IS cold, in that it is colder than the optimal 76º
Just because it's not a wind whipping snow blowing -10º blizzard doesn't mean it's warm ;)
If Tom Brady was a beast, he would have won the Superbowl. Besides, as a Marylander I have this innate feeling that having a talented quarterback is somehow cheating. I mean, look at our teams...
I acted the same way when I moved. I kept comparing Washington to West Virginia. Even though West virginians can't stand the rain, in washington we freak even if it gets close to 32 degrees. With two places, you just have to remember they both have a good and bad side and remember what they are before you get too snotty.
http://www.progressiveu.org/blog/tricia0711
FUCK YEAH! I'm from Sharon, MA, and it's basically Jew-ville. I don't like it locally, but I don't feel the whole "Boston spirit" here in Jewish suburbia.
But I loved your blog. *applause* We are opinionated up here.
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Do read my post fully. Not only does it help you understand my point instead of making rash statements, but it also gives me some semblance of faith that people can read and understand an argument.