intentionality

You asked us in class one day if we thought that people made themselves crazy. I thought to myself, “Yes.” You talked about intentionality and the intention of people making themselves crazy and I thought, “I don't think people MEAN to make themselves go crazy.” I guess that I believe becoming crazy, developing disorders, and having maladaptive thoughts and behaviors is like the result of a process of life experiences given to us by a higher power (nature) and our responses to those experiences (nurture). It's like a math problem when you think about it that may look like this. ([personality+temperament] + life experiences offered) x (our response to the two factors) = our current life situation. I believe that people have a lot of power to change many things about themselves, including personality, lives, and even our brain chemistry. Some of us cool people can handle almost any situation in life with ease and confidence, as though it were the most natural thing in the world. Some of us other funny people mess up once or twice or maybe a hundred times before we learn the right way to do things. Some people wilt and wither like promising looking flowers that have been exposed to too many elements. Some people never learn. Systematically and consciously choosing to be around people who make us feel good about ourselves and seeking out experiences in life that add to our dynamic minds create who we are. Our lives are always works in progress.
I don't think people mean for themselves to go crazy. However, I think that if they were aware and conscious of their own power to change their lives, they wouldn't be crazy. In a way, I think all people are pretty crazy, myself included. I talk to myself. There are voices in my head. I sometimes feel like I can't trust people, especially dudes. I have delusions of grandeur. I'm narcissistic at times and feel like people should treat me better because I'm one of the neatest people born since Crazy Horse and Sitting Bull. I can exhibit avoidant personality traits where I yearn for relationships but don't do anything to obtain those relationships. I have multiple personalities and I feel like my only friend. Sometimes I feel like there are a million of those personalities trying to integrate into one identity (God-like?). Yet, I am perfectly normal. It's almost an oxymoron isn't it? To be perfectly normal is to be crazy with a purpose. I think that we've all got that craziness gene in our genetic composition and how we use it is entirely up to us.
As I write these words, I feel like my thoughts are disorganized because I'm trying to say too many things that I can't express even in my mind. I think of my brain as something that works nonstop trying to calculate my ultimate purpose in this life and the path to it. Everything I see, learn, and feel in this world is for me to learn more about that higher purpose that was in mind at the time of my creation. I'm drawn to certain people, objects, and experiences because unconsciously, I desire those things to become part of me. To look at the bigger picture, I think it is part of my purpose to be the best person I can be and that is to make decisions with the benefit of the whole world in mind. In a way, it is to think like God. I think that ALL people have a part of themselves that seeks to become God-like in a way. I think it is part of my purpose. I believe things go wrong when people don't think much about ultimate purposes in life, giving birth, creation, and the whole process of conception as a powerful thing. When you think about it, all conditions have to be right in order for such things to take place, so why aren't those things valued? How we as people nurture the creation of our purpose in life and children as people, creators, parents, and teachers will have a huge impact on those creations because the things that we teach to children and ourselves through experience, modeling, and care-giving will become a huge part of that person's and our lives, personalities, and even brain functioning on an organic level. People are given this awesome ability to CREATE and we have decisions to make regarding whether or not that creation is positive or negative.
With all of those thoughts being transcribed, it seems to me that yes, we have the ability to create whether or not we, our children, and/or family goes crazy. If we affect the world around us and we don't use our powerful ability to create the life we choose for ourselves, we aren't fulfilling our purpose in this world and that is to choose a life path based on a greater good. I think that when people have ventured so far off the deep end because of everything life has thrown on their path and how they chose to deal with it, whether it be with substances or negative self-talk, they feel it is too late to change. I think that thought alone makes it nearly impossible to be normal again. When you keep telling yourself negative things about yourself, world, and people around you, you begin to create that reality for yourself. Yeah, it's nobody else's reality and what harm can it do if you're in your own crazy world, but I believe that every connection made in this world needs to be positive and fulfilling a greater good. If there is one person suffering, this whole world suffers. I don't think people with disorders or maladaptive thoughts and behavior care about this because of everything going on in their heads. They have created a reality that I can't see or understand. So, I don't really know. I'm just saying what I think about the whole idea of crazy people. In fact, this whole reaction paper sounds like a crazy person wrote it! That's ok though. I can't be crazy if I admit that I am crazy in ways. I guess the only time being crazy doesn't help is when it begins to affect you and others around you negatively. Reading about how people with schizophrenia increase the chances of their offspring and relatives to become schizophrenic got me thinking about that. I guess if you're going to be crazy in this world, it is best to actually do something positive with all those crazy thoughts and delusions of grandeur.

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